God's Grace Will See You Through

My mother-in-law loves Joyce Meyer and I think has every one of her books. She copied this from Joyce's newest devotional and gave it to me:

I want you to face the mountain
so that you can see,
when the mountain is out of the way
all there is left is Me.
Only I can move the mountain,
only I can push it away,
only I can conquer the problems
that you face today.
Your only job is to believe, to listen
to My voice,
and when you hear what I command,
obedience is your choice.
But I will not make it too difficult for the
victory is already mine,
and I will fill you with My Spirit and through
you My grace will shine.
Not when you are perfect,
like you think you need to be,
but when your heart is willing to become more
and more like Me.

---Joyce Meyer

Fist day of new treatment

Well.... I survived my first of four sessions of the IV antibody treatment. I was at MD Anderson for 10 hours. The treatment took 8 hours. I was put in a small hospital room in an emergency room like setting. There were about 20 beds that are used for the chemo patients around the nurses station. The nurse hooked me up to six different IV fluids. She started the Rituximab in small amounts and gradually increased it every 30 minutes. I had an allergic reaction to it after about an hour. More IV of Benadryl was given to me. Then about an hour later I had another reaction. Each time I had a reaction I got more Benadryl in an IV. I was so sleepy when I left at 9:30 that night that I thought David was going to have to carry me to the car. I was groggy all day Saturday.
Over all the treatment wasn't that bad at all. I think I can handle three more sessions but hopefully the next ones won't take as long. I brought a book and read but next time I'll bring my laptop. I was fed lunch and dinner (order like you do in the hospital) and there was a TV in the room. The nurses were all very nice.
It's Sunday night. David's mom is in town from Pennsylvania so we've been getting yummy home cooked meals (she loves to cook for us). She'll fly back home after Thanksgiving. I wonder if she can cook us a bunch of meals and we can freeze them!?!?!? Just kidding.... I wouldn't let her do that.

a wonderful surprise!

I got a terrific surprise yesterday. My BFF from work, Kelly W., dropped off a beautiful large green plant from my co-workers. I've been on a leave of absence from work since Oct. 1st. There was a card and everyone signed it. It brought tears to my eyes to think that so many people care! I'm such a lucky person to work with such a wonderful group of people. Dealing with cancer is so much easier when you have people there for you to help you get through it. I can't imagine being alone at this point in my life. God has blessed me with a great set of friends and co-workers and a great family. My parents (both sets), my brother, my grandmother, my mother-in-law, my brother-in-law, and numerous aunts, uncles and cousins. And of course my number one person in my life is my husband. The thoughtful cards and emails I get from people have meant more to me than I can describe.
My BFF Kelly W. has been one of those people who has been there for me from the beginning as well. We both started working with the probation department about the same time back in 1991. We became great friends when I transferred to court services in 2000. She's been there for me through both David's brain surgeries and my own medical problems. Everyone calls us two peas in a pod and double trouble. Of course we are the "Kellys" to everyone. She is Kelly 1 and I am Kelly 2. Kelly is three years older than me.... ha ha! Kelly is also my favorite shopping buddy in the world. We can antique shop until our feet fall off. Having a really good shopping partner is very difficult to find. You either have someone that is always in a hurry or someone who is a slow poke. But Kelly is just right. We love to hit the antique shops in Spring, Tomball, Rosenberg and Brenham. Kelly is single (good husband prospects please send applications to me as I must approve you first), has a dog and our biggest goal is to be the BEST Red Hat Society women when we hit 50. As soon as we turn 50 you will see us with our purple and red and flaunting some wild hats around town. Kelly is actually able to be a "princess in waiting" right now because she is over 40 but she's waiting for me. Next year I'll be 40 so we'll be wearing our pink hats until we can officially wear the red ones - can't wait!!!!!
Kelly W. - if you read this blog.... thanks for all the happy times - love you!!

Test results

Yesterday I went to see my oncologist at MD Anderson to get all my latest test results. My bone marrow biopsy was good - no cancer in the bone marrow. Whew.... When the cancer gets into the bone marrow it automatically makes it stage 4. I will be happy if I can limit the bone marrow biopsies to just once a year. They are not the most pleasant feeling thing to go through. All my scans came back good as well, just a few cyst and bumps here and there. So we just have the cancer in the stomach to treat. It looks like the cancer is only in the stomach right now so that means it's in remission in the chest area where I did the radiation last year. We are going to treat the cancer with an antibody treatment called Rituximab/Rituxan. The handout my doctor gave me states.... "Rituximab is a monoclonal antibody that is given intravenously (into the vein). It works with the immune system to target and destroy cancer cells. Rituximab is used to treat non-Hodgkins lymphoma, and may be given alone or in combination with other chemotherapy drugs". So I will do the treatment once a week for four weeks. I'm not sure how it will work with my immune system since it's next to null. Because of my sjogrens syndrome and chronic low white blood count, I don't have much of an immune system. In about four months I will do another stomach biopsy. The doctor said we'll do chemo at that time if the Rituximab doesn't knock out all the cancer. I will begin the antibody treatment this Friday. It'll take about six hours. I guess I'll pass the time on my ipod and bring my laptop. Luckily it won't make me lose any hair but it will make me feel sick. Chocolate time!! A good 'ole Hersheys bar seems to do wonders for me when I feel nauseous for some reason. And that would explain why I've gained 15 pounds over the last year. Pistachio nuts seem to help with nauseousness too. I never even liked those things until this year.
So.... that's the latest news. Until later......

canton, texas

The first weekend of this month I went to Canton, Texas with friends Karen and Jill. For those who do not know what Canton is.... it's like the biggest craft/antique/flea market in the world. It's HUGE!! I flew into Dallas from Houston and Jill flew in from Colorado Springs. Jill rented us a car (a new Mustang) and we drove out to Karen's house which is on a beautiful lake about an hour and a half east of Dallas. We got there in less than an hour because Jill was Mario Andretti in a former life. We stopped at a bait shop and saw the funniest scene.... in the large yard next to the bait shop was a little pony chasing a great dane around the yard. The pony was so frisky and jumping around. It was hilarious.
Of course Jill stayed up until 1:30 that Thursday night fishing on the boat deck. We spent Friday and Saturday at Canton walking around. We had such a wonderful time. The weather was totally beautiful. God blessed us with such a perfect weekend! Everyone must experience Canton at least once in their life. The best thing to do though is to stay in one of the cheaper bed and breakfasts or guest rooms within walking distance to the shops in Canton and plan on spending all day friday, saturday and sunday there. It's worth it to purchase a shopping cart for $20. Make sure to wear the most comfortable shoes you own and bring a backpack instead of a purse!

Tomorrow I have a doctor appointment at MD Anderson to get my last bone marrow biopsy results. I'll tell the story behind my cancer diagnosis on another day. It's a long story. My cancer is in my stomach now so I will also be finding out what my next treatment plan will be. I did four weeks of radiation in December 2006 in my chest area. Keep your fingers crossed that it's radiation again and not chemo.

girlfriends......

I turned 39 this year and also celebrated my 20 year high school reunion. I learned a few things this summer and can say it's been my most maturing year yet. Not just the extra gray hairs and wrinkles, but learning a lot about myself.
For one, I took a trip this summer with four friends I graduated high school with. We were all classmates in high school but some of us didn't really know each other that well.... we were all from different social groups back then. So a few weeks before our reunion we met up in Colorado and spent the most incredible four days at my friend Jill's yurt. For you Southern folks, a yurt is like a cabin. I know... I'd never heard of one either. Not only were the mountains breathtaking and wholesome, but the laughter of old friends was priceless. After not seeing each other for 20 years it was amazing how easily the chemistry and memories sparked us all back together. Not to mention I accidentally blew up the Tiki torch thanks to Debbie.
There is Jill, the artisit. She is an x-cop, x-band director and the world's greatest fisherwoman. Give the girl a reel, a worm and a glass of wine and she's in heaven. Then there is Debbie, the kick boxer. She is so beautiful she doesn't realize the heads that she leaves turning in her wake as she walks past. Karen is THE world's greatest mom. She has raised two wonderful kids and always has the perfect thing to say at all times. Last there is Alicia. She is in Never Never land and like me.... doesn't want to grow up and get old. We are always looking for her a husband but husband applicants must love Starbucks and be able to support her daily latte habit. And they would describe me as the former high school cheerleader, the serene and happy one. Debbie is trying to teach her 8th grade daughter to not judge a book by it's cover.... and that even the cheerleader can get the cancer....
These women have become my rock and I love them so much. Because they have become so special to me I will occasionally talk about them in my blog.